Today I turn 25. I am not a fan of celebrating my birthday and I don’t think I ever will be. And before this year I have always thought of my birthday as just another day. I have a different perspective now, though. Over the past year, as I have prepared for and been a pastor, I have realized how much of a sinner I actually am. I think I will continue to grow in understanding just how sinful I am, but this past year I have seen it more than ever before. Every step of the way, though, I have seen the grace of God all the more. I am more thankful for today than I have been thankful for any single day in the past 25 years. And I am praying that I continue to grow in my thankfulness for ‘today’ every day until God calls me home.
Every morning I write a letter to God in my prayer journal. Here is today’s:
You are Good and your mercy endures forever. With my whole heart I seek you, let me not depart from your word. Help me to always remember who I am in you: a sinner saved by grace for the spread of the gospel.
On this day, 25 years ago, I was born. Though you were near, I was born far from you. Though you had a plan for my salvation, I was dead in sin. O’ God I am a sinner. A man who deserved condemnation. Yet you give me your righteousness. A righteousness that I could not earn but could only receive through faith in Jesus Christ who is the propitiation in blood for my sin. My God, I thank you for salvation. I don’t deserve the 25 years that you have given me, yet through your grace and abundant mercy, you have chosen to use me for another second, minute, hour, day, year, or maybe another 25 years for the sake of your glory and the advance of your gospel. Every second that you have given me on earth is a testament to your steadfast love and faithfulness. I, the chief of sinners, seek to serve you ‘til my dying breath. Thank you for sending Jesus Christ to die for the sins of the world. He is the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. His name is the name above every name. There is no salvation apart from faith Him and His finished work. My God I believe that. Let my life be a testament to His work. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.